Conversation Before Crisis- End-of-Life Planning

Let’s explore the proverbial question of “what comes first, the chicken or the egg?”

Now let’s compare that story with planning for death.

Do you know that answer to that question? Or do you just have a strong intuition about which comes first?

Now here’s another question to ponder…..

Is it better to have a conversation before a crisis ? OR… is it better to first experience a crisis and have the conversation about it afterwards?


This question comes to mind when attempting to have difficult, yet honest, in-depth conversations about planning for the inevitable with ones  spouse, child or parents.

Why do you think so many people are uncomfortable talking about death? Isn’t it true that we will all die… we just don’t know when?

In fact the statistics are %100 percent. Those are the facts.

Are people so “afraid” of death that they are uncomfortable having any kind of conversation about it?  Maybe some think if they broach the subject, that they will bring death closer. So, does NOT talking about death actually keep death at bay??

The fact is that we all are going to die.  This should not be a surprise to anyone.

Engaging in conversations before a crisis occurs will ultimately save time, costs, stress, guesswork and potentially harmful family disagreements about a loved one’s care at the end- of- life.  Doesn’t that sound like a good idea?

Have you ever experienced “crisis mode” with respect to a loved ones health and well-being? Have you ever experienced the sudden death of a loved one?  Do you think that knee jerk reactions  and decisions made during a crisis is a sound way to map out a plan of action for the benefit of those in crisis? Don’t you think it becomes unnecessarilymore complicated when people don’t talk about end-of-life planning and death before it happens?

It takes time to change the way we approach the topic of planning and death. That willingness to have the transparent, meaningful conversations before a crisis occurs will benefit everyone involved-the person making the plans (thus having some control over what happens) their spouses, their family and loved ones.

The Conversation Project and are both great resources for starting the conversations-before a crisis. will soon provide a beneficial tool for planning for death by , planning fordocumenting important personal information and intentions.  The gift of preparedness is at the heart ofLastingMatters.

Share your “crisis” stories with me.  What do you wish you had known before the crisis?